Rumors, a farce, by Neil Simon
Four couples arrive at the townhouse of a deputy New York City mayor and his wife to attend a party celebrating their tenth wedding anniversary. However, the four couples soon discover that there are no servants, the hostess is missing, and the
deputy mayor has shot himself in the head (it’s only a flesh wound). Comic
complications arise when, given everyone's upper-class status, they decide they need to do everything possible to conceal the evening’s events from the local police and the

Character descriptions (ages are flexible):
Chris Gorman: f, 32-38 -- Ken’s elegant and attractive wife. A bit high strung. (This is
a large role.)
Ken Gorman: m, 32-40 -- A well-spoken, handsome attorney. A bit high strung. (This
is a large role.)
Claire Ganz: f, 30-40 -- Lenny’s gossip-monger, attractive wife. A Westchester, New
York housewife type. (This is a large role.)
Lenny Ganz: m, 32-42 -- An accountant who has just wrecked his brand new BMW.
Irascible, sarcastic, and very likeable. (This is a large role.)
Ernie Cusack: m, 40-55 -- A smug psychiatrist. (This is a medium role.)
Cookie Cusack: f, 40-50 -- Ernie’s wife and a cooking show host with a bad back. She
has a very dramatic, physical personality. (This is a medium role.)
Glenn Cooper: m, 32-50 -- An ambitious, polished man preparing for a run for the
state senate. A Kennedy-type. (This is a medium role.)
Cassie Cooper: f, 25-35 -- A jealous type who believes in the healing power of
crystals. Glenn’s trophy wife. Insecure, sexy, shrewish. (This is a medium role.)
Officer Welch: m or f, 35-50 -- A vigorous, straight-talking, veteran police officer.
(This is a small role.)
Officer Pudney: f (could be male), 23-31 -- A rookie cop. (This is a very small role.)